Although I’ve been a naturist since my late teens, most of my naturist activities were either on naturist holidays or at home. However 2 years ago I presented myself in public to promote naturism/acceptance of nudity and tried to find other females to join me only to find that although there are plenty of naturist men in the public domain & on social media, the females are very hard to find. I have been asked the question “Why are there not more females into naturism in the UK?” quite a number of times, so I decided to give it some thought and write something to let you ponder over! So this post is about what I believe might be the reasons for this imbalance.
I do not claim to be an expert but being a female I feel I can shed some light on this. There are some people who have deeper understanding and may relate this issue with some social or demographic reason, I am unlikely to be able to write something as serious as that, but I am entitled to my opinion and this is what I think;
UK Attitudes. Most people are aware that attitudes to nudity in Europe are better than those experienced in the UK, here nudity is still bit of a ‘odd’ thing in most people’s eyes. This doesn’t mean that we the Brits are too shy about going nude when abroad. So if we can do it there what stops us from doing it here.. probably the social pressure where the friends and relatives do not approve of nudity and we are not able to argue the case with everyone. Females have always suffered more from the society’s views and nudity is no different. Nudity is not seen as a respectable activity even if it is acceptable for the most influential females or celebrities to be caught nude on holidays. This is obviously double standards, one rule for home and another when on holidays.
Sex. There are many men who use naturism as means to get sexual pleasure. This is not the case for single females in most cases. Men & Women use their own nudity to turn themselves on but men have more reason to do so than women because basically if a female wants a man, it is easy enough, but if a man wants a woman, he has to work at it. So a lone female doesn’t need to use naturism to attract a sexual partner and even if she is a naturist in her private life, she doesn’t need to be open about it in the social media because to do so would invite criticism and unwanted attention.
Having said this, there are obviously men who just wish to be in mixed sex company and if they don’t have their own partner they appreciate the company of other females. This adds up to the imbalance of numbers.
Shame. Most of the naturist men/women in the social media avoid disclosing their identity. This is because they are concerned about public opinion and also want freedom to be what they desire as fantasy, to be able to say what they feel without being judged by friends/family. This mysterious group does not help the natural approach to nudity or naturism. It could be argued that if you have something to hide, then there must be something dirty or wrong that you are doing. If you are honest and clear about your objectives, why would you not want others to know who you are? Any female who is honest about her life as a naturist would not wish to engage with men who are out to get cheap thrills, so they stay out of sight and don’t advertise the naturist part of their life. It would be easier if naturist men were open about their beliefs and did not hide their identity. I know this could have some serious implications for some people but if you believe in something, you need to be ready to fight for your rights.
Sexy Females. Females who hide under a false id and get a kick out of their sexual contact with others do not help the situation, this just leads men to believe that most females that identify themselves as naturists/nudes are open to sexual kicks so therefore they continue their fantasy discussions with them, this obviously puts them off and could make them believe that naturist men are just perverts looking for some fun. Whilst I’m not suggesting that the Internet becomes sex free (bit like asking for world peace!!), I would ask that if you are a man and want to see more females in naturism, then you need to learn to separate the sex kittens from natural/naturist females.
(There is a difference between those who engage others for sexual entertainment and those who are nude for just personal pleasure)
No Need. This is probably the biggest reason why there are very few naturist females in public. Females do not need to go nude all the way to enjoy nudity. Because we as females are able to dress up or dress down and still enjoy a level of nudity/freedom in normal places, there is no need for us to go to a designated naturist place. For example.. on a beach; if a female wishes, she can go topless in most areas. In this day and age, the only thing that stops a girl from going topless is herself. It is true that in some areas, she is likely to get more attention than she wants, but she doesn’t have to go far to get to a place where she feels comfortable. In addition to going topless, like myself, other females are quite happy to wear a small thong that covers no more than 2 inches of the body. This is virtually nude and the thongs nowadays are very comfortable and you don’t even notice that you’re wearing them. So if a female or a group of females can do this on a normal decent beach, why would they wish to go out of their way to a naturist beach that very often is out of the way and has no amenities. This is even more so in Europe, where topless females can be seen on many more beaches than in the UK.
Fear. Females don’t generally want to upset the balance of their environment, they fear that they will be judged as sex mad if they are the first ones to do something that might be controversial, even going topless as I have explained above. So it takes one woman to set the trend and others then follow. I experience this quite often, most recently in Cannes, South of France. Even at a place such as that (where most people expect nudity), there is need for the females to feel that they are doing the right thing in the right place. When I arrived at a beach restaurant it was almost full, although there were some topless females on the public beach about 100 meters away, none of the females in the restaurant beach had gone topless. This led me to question whether this was allowed or not, it was an expensive place, where just the hire of the deck chair was about £25. It was very hot and we only had a few hours of the afternoon left. As I hate tan lines, I decided to test the system and go topless and just wear a very small thong. Being on crutches, I probably looked quite ridiculous but I wanted to enjoy the sun & the beach and so no reason why anyone should be upset by my nudity.
(Beach restaurant in Cannes)
I walked to the beach and to the restaurant in my thongs and no one made any comments, within 15 min to half an hour of doing that, I discovered that quite a number of other females, old and young had also now gone topless. Couple of the females were in their 60s whilst others ranged from teens to middle aged. Perhaps it was a coincident but I have experienced this type of behaviour a number of times, which leads me to believe that it is the case of someone leading and others will follow, much like as it is in Fashion. I believe that if just a few females start to go topless in Parks, it would open up the attitudes in the UK and maybe before too long we too could enjoy a more liberal society.
Fashion. Finally, Fashion. Men see it as ‘erotic’ whilst women see it as ‘feel good’ more than erotic. It is much easier for the females to use fashion to feel good, maybe sexy (I don’t mean take me I am yours kind of sexy!), and maybe experience the enjoyment and freedom of being nude or semi-nude. Whilst I admit, there are not many females that go about the normal places dressed the way I do, there are quite a few and more of them are found in nightclubs, late night spots, holiday places. There is much more of the body on display nowadays than in the past. Media obviously plays a big role in this. Although not many females will pluck up the courage to go to their local pub dressed like Lady GaGa, I am sure that they are wearing much less than they might have been 20 years ago and they are more likely to be adventurous on big nights out or whist on holidays.
(Helping to promote London 2012! I think Boris should use this Pic!!)
Fashion lets females feel free and good about themselves. This is not enjoyed so much by the men, who need actual nudity as they only have one thing that dictates whether they are nude or not.. if they have that hanging out in public then they are very likely to find themselves in trouble.
I am very fortunate that I am able to go out in one of the most multicultural cities in the world. People are quite accepting of any fashion statement. Whilst I may not be able to go out completely naked, what I wear is not exactly hiding my nudity. In my own mind, I think ‘You don’t want me to be nude but I am and you can’t do much about it’. Unfortunately unless the men are close friends of ‘Right Said Fred’, or homosexual on their way to a gay bar, they are not likely to get away with a thong or loosely crocheted shirt in public. This pushes them towards wanting to be a naturist so that they too can feel the enjoyment of being free and naked.
Fashion is also responsible for making nudity look dirty/sexy. If you look at my pictures of me totally nude and those that are semi- nude through clothing, which ones look more erotic? So the objective is to do away with clothing as much as possible, wherever possible, but if that cannot be done, then we should encourage the girls to do the next best thing, wear a little as possible without looking like ‘working girls’.
I also have to say… it is not what you wear it’s how you wear it. You can wear clothing that allows you to be semi-nude without making you look like a tart (well some might disagree).
I have said it in my blog many times that clothing makes females more erotic than total nudity, this is true, whilst I don’t wish to encourage misunderstanding that nudity means sex, it is nevertheless better to have nudity accepted through fashion than not at all.
Conclusion: The society allows females to enjoy a level of nudity through fashion or because of their unthreatening female form. This means that there is less of a need for girls to be activists for naturism than men. Fashion obviously is not going to promote total nudity, they would go out of business!! But where fashion leads to semi-nudity, it should be promoted through acceptance and encouragement and men should not make the females feel uncomfortable by showing too much attention.
If a female can sunbathe topless in the local park walk down the street wearing whatever she chooses to wear, without being harassed or thought of as a bad person (slut or worse!), more are likely to do the same. If she is seen only as a sex object, then there is every need for her to cover up for safety. If you see a topless girl in the park, leave her be, let her enjoy herself, walk away and enjoy the glimpse of happiness. She does not want to talk to you, nor does she need help in understand whether what she is doing is right or wrong. It is natural and allow her the freedom to do it.
If a female is on the social media and not openly advertising her sexual services, then don’t assume that she is there for your sexual entertainment. If she posts a picture of nude or semi-nude body, avoid making sexual comments, she is not saying I want sex.. she is just sharing her feelings of enjoyment with you.
If this helps you to understand any of my views, I am very happy, I may not be right, but I am honest and open about my views and identity, which is lot more than vast majority of social media users. If you wish to add to this discussion, please comment and share with others.